Functional Family???

There is an article in the Feb. 2009 Ensign about being a functional family. I will just put a few key points down.

"Calling a family functional doesn't mean it's perfect. However, in a family that functions well, family members recognize that they have weaknesses, and they work to improve their relationships despite their weaknesses."

Focus on Strengthening Family: Intentionally focusing on your family means you think about the impact of what you say or do not say to your children. As parents, you begin sending messages about how you feel about your children from the minute they are born. These messages include your words, actions, and attitudes, whether you meant to or not. All of these messages shape how children come to view themselves.

Examples of unintentional though often harmful messages include ignoring or being impatient with a child. If you are too busy to spend time with your son or daughter, you might be sending the message "You are not very important to me." Now, remember, sometimes you can't help being busy, so don't get too paranoid about this. Just remember it is important to intentionally send positive messages to edify your children and to evaluate now and again what messages you are sending so you can adjust as necessary.

Be Active Teachers: Adam and Eve were excellent examples of parents being good teachers. For example, "Adam and Eve...made all things known unto their sons and their daughters" (Moses 5:12) If we leave the spiritual education of our children to chance or to someone else,l we take a big risk that they won't learn the things that will bring them true happiness.

Lead by Example: Ask Yourself These Questions,

-What messages would you like to intentionally send your child?

-Do I want my children t be patient? Yes, so try to be as patient as you can with them.

-Do I want my children to relax, have fun, and learn to enjoy life? Yes, because these qualities are vital to developing healthy, happy relationships.

-Do I want my children to read the scriptures and wholesome books? Yes, make sure they see you reading them.

-Do I want my children to care about family relationships? Yes, so I kiss and hug them, smile at them, listen to them, play with them, and share personal experiences with them.

Teach Your Children Faith in Heavenly Father and in the Lord Jesus Christ: Perhaps the most important thing you will do in your life will be to teach and to keep the commandments. This is a commandment from the Lord (Mosiah 4:15).

Remember to be patient with yourself and your family members. Relationships improve in stages, not overnight. Strengthening them requires time and effort.

-James D. MacArthur, PhD, Ensign Feb. 2009)